Life often comes down to a collection of moments and decisions. We get to experience a spectrum of different feelings and emotions. Our lives are filled with beautiful moments from a shared laughter with a friend, to tender hugs, or special bonding times with our favorite people, helping someone in need, or feeling loved and loving…and on the other hand, the dichotomy of life means that we also go through hard damaging moments such as the loss of friendships or the loss of a partner, the death of loved ones, isolation during a pandemic, natural disasters that destroys our livelihood or our home, health problems, the loss of a job…Both opposites can be true. The brutal and beautiful moments all collide together and weave our own unique story line.
Whenever I find myself in a place of hardship or doubt, the Japanese art of Kintsugi has been a soft place to land, to regroup and find hope because it helps me see the value in both opposites. Kintsugi is derived from the words “kin” which means golden and “Tsugi” which means joinery. It translates to “golden repair”. It is a beautiful art form in which an artist mends the areas of breakage in a glass or a pottery with a golden resin. The breakage and the repair both become important parts of the object ‘s history, rather than something to disguise. This idea that adversity can make something more beautiful, and that old things have a history that makes them unique, rich and valuable, is both comforting and inspiring. I love to apply that same mindset to how we view each other too. Kintsugi exemplifies the spirit of Wabi Sabi. It is a virtue or a way of life that celebrates the beauty of the naturally imperfect. It is the concept of embracing imperfection, the art of finding pleasure and beauty in aged and worn objects or people and value their blemishes.
It encourages us to slow down, to connect with our true nature, and to be gentler on ourselves. When we embrace the notions of Kintsugi and Wabi Sabi, we focus on what really matters, on substance and not on appearances. It encourages us to show our true selves to the world, to celebrate our blemishes and scars and instead of building a new armor, we fully accept our own natural one and walk onward bravely. We can choose to mend our areas of breakage with a soft and loving acceptance that reminds us of the golden repair that mends a pottery. We can glow from the inside out too by embracing all of ourselves…the damaged and the beautiful. We also know to look for it in other people around us and offer them grace and acceptance too. It helps everyone be more at ease with our common shared human experience that sometimes takes us on roller coaster rides of emotions. When we see it and share it, we help others do the same.
The next time we are in the middle of a breakage, I hope we can tune inward for a breath or two and remind ourselves of the Kintsugi approach. May it be both freeing and invigorating, soothing and affirming, loving and nurturing because we know that the broken moments of our lives can be mended into a celebration of our growth. We grow through what we go through. We earn every gold scar that makes us who we are today. Our life is uniquely ours. By seeing the value in our blemishes, we get to openly celebrate what makes us authentic and one of a kind. It is vulnerable, bold and raw. It is also filled with hope and love. It connects us all to the golden truth that we are all worthy just as we are right now.
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